Antonin Artaud
[to be written up at college]
The exercises we did today
Starter exercise
Today when we walked into the classroom, Andy had set out a circle of small instruments such as bells, wooden sticks and such and we were told to silently put down our bags and sit beside an instrument. When we were all sat down Andy picked up his own instrument and began to shake it in a steady beat. He motioned for us to follow suit and then proceeded to conduct something that was almost a ritual, walking around the room with all of us playing our instruments to a range of beats. It reminded me of a pagan ritual ro something, dancing around making no noise but the beat of our instruments. When we finished we all sat down, still in complete silence, and allowed ourselves to feel the silence. I felt very meditative, it felt like we're were still in part of the ritual, and we all shared how we felt about it, using a single word to explain how we felt. I could feel the energy of everyone around me and I felt so revitalized, like when you've just taken a long drink of cold water on a boiling hot day and you can feel it rushing through your body and filling you with energy.
Grid exercise
This exercise was demonstrating Artaud's philosophy of "Be cruel to yourself". Andy has us visualize a grid on the floor and walk along the lines as if "The possibility of being loved is what is pulling you". It started out fairly simple however the more into it I got the more emotional I felt. It got to a point where I felt desperate and powerless, I was rushing and bumping into people, unable to thing straight and feeling completely overwhelmed. My heart and mind were racing and I felt like I could shatter into a million pieces any minute and finally Andy said "Slow down". As I slowed I felt my emotions slowly overpower me and by the time I came to a stop I was crying. I felt so emotionally drained and like I had hundreds of emotions surging through me. I don't know why I felt so emotionally struck my the exercise or why I reacted that way, perhaps it was the idea of chasing love. When I was doing the exercise I pictured my family. My mum, my dad, my brother and sisters. It felt like the faster and harder I went in the exercise the further away they got and then I realised that I couldn't actually picture my youngest sister Miki's face. I felt like the exercise symbolised my life, with my family so far away and me chasing my dreams and living my new, independent life. However sometimes I feel like I miss so much. Every time I go back down to Devon they've all grown and changed so much and it's very difficult. Perhaps it was something else. I don't know. I think it was an incredible exercise though, I'm glad I got so much out of it and it really demonstrated what Artaud is trying to do with his ideas. I think that reaching that level of emotion and feeling that stripped back, and being that cruel to yourself is necessary in the style that we're working on. It's necessary to feel like that yourself before you can make the audience feel the same way.
Slow Motion & Emotions
The point of this exercise was to show the size of performance needed in this style. Many Theatre of Cruelty performances are supposed to be in huge spaces or even outdoors, and to be able to convey a performance in such an expansive environment you do need to make your acting size bigger. Also, however, you need to be bigger than usual because you're trying to make the audience feel very extreme things. You can't go half way, you need to be at 900%, if you act half way then the audience will only feel half way. This exercise helped us develop these techniques, as well as highlighting the need for trust, control and focus. The emotions exercise did the same thing, showing us how some things make us feel so much more and quicker than others.
Ritual
This exercise was so much fun, we had to create a war dance. When we first started to make it people were being really technical and trying to map out the whole thing however I didn't feel like that was the point. We weren't supposed to make a perfect piece of movement, we were supposed to make a war dance which should be both scary and pump someone up for war. We started beating our sticks together in time and I felt a sort of grunt or chant come up, and people started to join in. We just did this, using volume and pace, getting faster and faster and screeching and howling. When we performed it we started dancing around the other group, running around them pulling horrific faces and screeching and beating our instruments and the other group said that there were some times when they felt genuinely terrified. I think this is so cool, it showed that going "I am absolutely terrifying, I'm going to hurt you, raaahhhh!!!" is so much less effecting than simple beats and noises and facial expressions.
Grid exercise
This exercise was demonstrating Artaud's philosophy of "Be cruel to yourself". Andy has us visualize a grid on the floor and walk along the lines as if "The possibility of being loved is what is pulling you". It started out fairly simple however the more into it I got the more emotional I felt. It got to a point where I felt desperate and powerless, I was rushing and bumping into people, unable to thing straight and feeling completely overwhelmed. My heart and mind were racing and I felt like I could shatter into a million pieces any minute and finally Andy said "Slow down". As I slowed I felt my emotions slowly overpower me and by the time I came to a stop I was crying. I felt so emotionally drained and like I had hundreds of emotions surging through me. I don't know why I felt so emotionally struck my the exercise or why I reacted that way, perhaps it was the idea of chasing love. When I was doing the exercise I pictured my family. My mum, my dad, my brother and sisters. It felt like the faster and harder I went in the exercise the further away they got and then I realised that I couldn't actually picture my youngest sister Miki's face. I felt like the exercise symbolised my life, with my family so far away and me chasing my dreams and living my new, independent life. However sometimes I feel like I miss so much. Every time I go back down to Devon they've all grown and changed so much and it's very difficult. Perhaps it was something else. I don't know. I think it was an incredible exercise though, I'm glad I got so much out of it and it really demonstrated what Artaud is trying to do with his ideas. I think that reaching that level of emotion and feeling that stripped back, and being that cruel to yourself is necessary in the style that we're working on. It's necessary to feel like that yourself before you can make the audience feel the same way.
Slow Motion & Emotions
The point of this exercise was to show the size of performance needed in this style. Many Theatre of Cruelty performances are supposed to be in huge spaces or even outdoors, and to be able to convey a performance in such an expansive environment you do need to make your acting size bigger. Also, however, you need to be bigger than usual because you're trying to make the audience feel very extreme things. You can't go half way, you need to be at 900%, if you act half way then the audience will only feel half way. This exercise helped us develop these techniques, as well as highlighting the need for trust, control and focus. The emotions exercise did the same thing, showing us how some things make us feel so much more and quicker than others.
Ritual
This exercise was so much fun, we had to create a war dance. When we first started to make it people were being really technical and trying to map out the whole thing however I didn't feel like that was the point. We weren't supposed to make a perfect piece of movement, we were supposed to make a war dance which should be both scary and pump someone up for war. We started beating our sticks together in time and I felt a sort of grunt or chant come up, and people started to join in. We just did this, using volume and pace, getting faster and faster and screeching and howling. When we performed it we started dancing around the other group, running around them pulling horrific faces and screeching and beating our instruments and the other group said that there were some times when they felt genuinely terrified. I think this is so cool, it showed that going "I am absolutely terrifying, I'm going to hurt you, raaahhhh!!!" is so much less effecting than simple beats and noises and facial expressions.
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